What have I learned about pregnancy from actually being pregnant? That I know nothing about being pregnant from actually being pregnant. Did I think that all of a sudden I would know everything I needed to instantly? Yes. Of course! It's genetic. My brother hated it when my mom tried to teach him numbers, letters and reading before school. On the first day of school he got dressed, grabbed his backpack and climbed onto mom's lap. "Ok, teach me." Well, he was ready now.
I'm ready now. Where's my instant knowledge? Sheesh. I must admit I have an abundance of friends who have had kids who I can learn from. I also have many friends who are due close to my due date. There's just something about knowing. Their experiences might not be what I experience. I have this overwhelming need to know exactly what is going to happen...and that can't happen.
I heard the heartbeat today. Kind of. It was more like a fuzzy TV sound mixed with a tiny thump but the Dr. seemed to know exactly what it was. 170 (I learned today that this is normal).
I've learned about cravings. Craving Panda Express? Are you kidding me? Disaster. What baby wants, baby gets...no matter the consequences to me.
I've learned how to visualize food to find out if that is really what I want. And then to not rely on wanting that food once it is ready.
I've learned that crying is not in my control. It will come at any time, any place, and for any number of reasons...including no reason at all.
I've learned sleep is also out of my control. I must sleep in, take naps, and go to bed early. I'm known for having weird dreams if I eat late at night - but nothing compares to the dreams I have now. What I worry about during the day becomes a twisted nightmare or at least very real when I sleep.
I've learned that I am going to mess up or forget things. It's called "baby brain" and I don't like it (which takes me back to the crying).
People tell me I will forget the sickness, the pain and the emotional part of pregnancy and do this all over again. So I will have to learn this stuff all over again? Great.
The only thing I can promise you is that it is all worth it. Every second of heartburn, every pound gained, every missed task due to sleep, every tear - when you hold that little one in your arms, you wont forget that it was hard, you'll just know it was worth it.
ReplyDeleteI totally forgot about the heartburn. I hope that means I've been better about what I eat lately.
ReplyDeleteI know you're right, and probably the reason for the memory loss. I just wanted to remember all of these points for the next time so I can't say I am shocked the second time around.